I took a look at my Thanksgiving post from last year.
I still feel the same.
The pain of loss in year two does not subside. Maybe the edges dull for moments or parts of moments, but the reality of a void that will never fill is just that, a reality.
That being said we make choices everyday.
One is to be thankful for what we had as opposed to being bitter for what we don’t have.
Don’t misunderstand, it is impossible as parents (and those of you as friends, cousins, classmates, lacrosse buddies of Chris) to not think of what it would be like with Chris still here. If he had played at SFU or a Canadian University, this weekend would be the first reconnecting point after his Freshman term start. If he was in the US, we may be traveling with Max for a quick family reunion. Who knows.
What I’ve learned over time is that you must let your mind go there, but it can’t stay there. If you stay with the ‘what ifs’, it will paralyze you.
Instead we will concentrate on what we had and for those 17 most amazing years we are so thankful. We are also so amazingly grateful at seeing how Chris’ life continues to inspire people (including us!) to Be The Best. An amazing gift and legacy that will forever be a part of so many of us.
I’d write a new list, but I’m still pretty happy about last years, so here is that post.
Have a great time with your families and friends this weekend.
Just a quick note to wish each of you a very Happy Thanksgiving.
People have asked me what we’re doing, how we are ‘celebrating’ etc.
It would be easy to think that there is not much to be thankful for this year, but strangely enough I feel mostly the opposite.
Please don’t misunderstand. If we could, we would have Chris back in a millisecond. That is a given. That will not change. Our love for Chris only grows day by day and we miss him so terribly much.
That being said, we know he physically can no longer be with us so we must choose to continue our journey on earth with Chris with us in spirit…and that’s what we’re doing.
So with that as the consistent backdrop, do we have things to be thankful for?
Yes. Here’s 5 of them.
- Family – My wife and son Max are amazing to me. I couldn’t be more proud. (extended family too!!)
- Friends – Continue to be friends in the deepest sense of the word.
- Work Colleagues – Quietly supportive by allowing work to be a place of alternate focus.
- Sports – Love watching competition. Love competing.
- Coffee – It’s those small things in life that can be so great…especially when you’re sharing.
And although not on an official list, I am so incredibly thankful for every event, photo, moment, laugh, discussion, drive, walk, ping-pong game or meal we had with Chris. So incredibly thankful.
Chris…know that we love you so very much and we LOVED every moment we had with you.
For that we are thankful, not just this weekend, but forever.