Be The Best.


I’ll try to bring some pics forward that you probably haven’t seen before.  Chris had played a December tournie in Seattle for a number of years including a few months back in 2009.

You see Chris here (grey helmet) in pursuit and ready to aid his fellow defender and ward off an enemy attack!  He loved playing defense.  Where other players lived to score goals, he got that same satisfaction stripping a ball from a goal scorer, breaking up an offensive play and then moving the ball quickly up the field to push his team forward.  Throw in some good physical contact and it was a great day at the office!

I love the second picture…taken on the next day.  He’s wearing his Team BC helmet (you can see the 41 on it) and he’s just provided the other team’s offensive player a reminder of what’s going to happen if he wants to get close to the goal.  One of his lacrosse teammates told me he hated going up against Chris in practice because he knew he was going to feel it, but he loved going against Chris in practice because he knew he was going to get better.

Getting better usually requires getting out of the comfort zone.

Be The Best.

Room for a view (part 2)

If you haven’t read ‘Room for a view’ part one, have a quick start there and then this will make more sense…maybe!

Ok, so the results are in.  As of this morning, 44% of voters said painted lines on the freeway are 5ft long, 24% said 2ft, 18% said 8ft and only 15% said 10ft.  Answer?  It depends…but it is never under 10 ft. according to my definitive research team.  An American study indicates US lines are 10 ft, but I had a chance to talk to my Dad yesterday and he personally measured 16-18 foot lines in 3 different spots in BC a few decades ago (really!).  I had 10 feet in my mind, so upon further intensive research, where did I find my confirmed Canadian answer?  If you can believe it, right on the BCIT website for our Civil Engineering program.  The length of the lines “depends on the speed limit – sometimes the paint segments are actually five meters long (about 16 feet).”  Dad, you were right on!!  The point of the US study was that most people thought lines were 2 feet long.  In our poll, 85% of us believed the lines to be 8ft or under….which is too short.

The point? Both speed and angle of how you view the lines changes your perspective and therefore your understanding of how long those lines are.

I was in a video game store with Chris many years ago when he was about 7 or 8 and a lot shorter!  You know those video game display demo things they have at the front of the store?  He could easily reach the controls and he was trying out a game.  I was looking at the screen as he played.  ‘Look out’, I said, ‘you’re going to get hit’….and sure enough his player bit it.  This happened 3 times.  I asked Chris why he didn’t move his man…he said he couldn’t see.  I asked him what he was talking about, it was so obvious…just move your player to the right.

I can’t see Dad.  What?  Then it dawned on me.  I knelt down so my head level was at the same level as Chris.  Because of the angle of the screen and my ‘NEW PERSPECTIVE’, it was obvious.  The screen was angled and you could only see a shimmer of action at that level, not the full game.  What was ‘obvious’ to me, was not obvious to him, largely because of our angle of approach.

I’ve never forgotten that video game story and it’s helped me many times to remember to check my perspective.  The dashed lines on the freeway exercise is an interesting one as it challenges our understanding of what we think we see.  These blog posts are called ‘Room for a view’ because it’s a reminder to me to always be aware of seeing situations (work, family, life, business) from multiple perspectives.  Your speed and approach may lead you to greater understanding, room for another viewpoint…Chris taught me that on a video game system when he was 7 or 8.

Be The Best.

Room for a view…

Perspective is an interesting thing.

You know those dashed lines on the freeway?  How long do you think they are?

I know we have a lot of young drivers following along on the blog, so let’s test our knowledge.

My Dad used to love to ask this question…and I got it wrong until I went out and measured one of those lines…except I didn’t measure it on the freeway.

Plus, this was a great excuse to use the Blog Poll feature.  Yes, I am fascinated by technology.  You can feel sorry for Ingrid at any time.  😉

Tomorrow’s blog will build on today’s poll, so vote away…and yes, there is a point to be made here..I’ll aim to make it…right after you vote.

Be The Best.

Ping Pong and $20,000.

It was quite a day.  Firstly, Ingrid played ping pong tonight after some pizza and watching a little NBA action.  That doesn’t usually happen, but Beau and Cooper (more of Chris’ gang from Brookswood) were over and she was right in there.  Max captured the action on camera.  Good games by all.

Earlier this afternoon we got some amazing news from Simon Fraser University.  The CHRIS FRIESEN MEMORIAL AWARD FUND has reached and surpassed the $20,000 goal!!!  This is amazing news as it means Chris’ fund is now set for life and will continue to provide opportunity for lacrosse playing SFU students for decades to come.  THANK YOU ALL!  What an amazing accomplishment.  This is WITHOUT, the dollars raised from the lacrosse sticks and AC’s incredible donation of proceeds from Love Shines which are still to be added and will continue to help the fund grow.  Wow.  We are humbled, excited and are looking forward to making the first presentation of the Chris Friesen Memorial Award in January 2011. From wristbands to cheques to thoughts and prayers you have all contributed to making this award a legacy fund.  We are incredibly amazed at the support and generosity.  THANK YOU!!!

Now, let’s get back to some ping pong!

Beau powers a serve while Randy does something...
Cooper pounds a return while Max thinks about how Lost ended.
Look at that concentration.

Be The Best.

I’ve got nothing…

‘I’ve got nothing.  I can’t think of anything to say.’

I’ve heard that a lot in the past few weeks and again today.  Guess what?  I totally get it…and I totally respect it.  Guess what else?  We deeply respect and appreciate any thought or action including many who don’t know what to say.

What is there to say?  Ingrid asked me how I was doing today.  Good and sad was my answer.  It was a good day…but losing Chris has left a hole that is so large it will simply be impossible to fill in this lifetime.  That being said, so many awesome things are happening.  I’m hearing stories (facebook, email, phone calls, in person) about people Being The Best.  It is awesome.  The Chris Friesen-Be The Best lacrosse sticks are amazing! (reminder: orders close this Sunday). I got a call this week from Team BC, the Provincial lacrosse team.  The U16 and U19 teams will be wearing a CF on their jerseys at the Canadian Nationals this Labour Day in Saskatoon!  How cool is that?

Chris (41) handles ball at Field Nationals 2009 in Winnipeg

These are the things that keep us moving forward.  Not just the remembrance stuff, but the knowledge that Chris touched so many lives and has inspired so many.  And don’t forget, Be The Best doesn’t mean winning all the time.  Max and I were watching Steve Nash and the Suns lose to the Lakers in a heartbreaker tonight.  Yah, they lost, but Steve Nash was the best.  He was incredible.  That’s what it is all about.  Breaking your own records, setting the bar higher and HELPING PEOPLE along the way.  Life is a team game!

Go rock your Friday.

Be The Best.

2 months plus a day…

Tonight I take you back to night one.   At some point we tried to sleep but sleep was not on our side that evening so I sat in my chair in the livingroom and looked out the window.  We live on a little rise and framed in our window was the lit cross at the Christian Life Assembly shimmering in the distance and one light on a hill above the church.

That lone glowing light from a far away home nestled above the glow of the far away cross provided some comfort on that first night.

With so many sympathy cards coming our way in the weeks that followed, I was surprised at how many were different.  There was one card however that came at least four or five times.  It’s a simple blue band on a white background with a rhinestone star.  There is just one simple statement, “one star in the night sky”.  After two months plus a day, that one star is shining ever brighter.  The glow is being duplicated in hearts and minds from young to old as we all strive to Be The Best.

Be The Best.

Taize, singing bowls and AC at the Abbey.

You remember AC right? Ya, that’s Auntie Cathy to some and just ‘sis’ to me!

Those songs from Chris’ funeral were amazing and I love listening to Love Shines.  If you didn’t hear it, you can now, with all the cards we received as a backdrop. (video below)

Anyhoo…Cathy plays about once per year at the Westminster Abbey in Mission.  If you’ve never been to the Abbey, it’s worth a visit.  This ‘service’ is different than anything you’ve ever experienced.  The acoustics are unbelievable and the setting is amazing.  For full details on the what, where, when, how, check out her blog post. Brent, Cathy’s husband, recently returned from India on business and brought Cath a 100 year old ‘singing bowl’.  She’ll be using it that night.

For me personally, that service is very intense with the silence and music, but Ingrid and I have snuck in for a song or two along with a walk on the beautiful grounds.  If you want to do something completely different from the usual, the Abbey is the place to be this coming Saturday, May 29th from 8-9pm.

Be The Best.

Parking ticket please.

Man, I could really go for a parking ticket right about now.

Perhaps I should explain.  On a Saturday in early March of this year, a newly licensed Chris took a friend (that was a girl, but not a girlfriend!) to White Rock for ice cream, a walk, whatever.  He came home with a parking ticket.  When asked about it, he mumbled stuff about stupid parking meters, coins, and something about it wasn’t working.  Ok, sure.  My ‘Dad sense’ was thinking more that he hadn’t used the pay meters before, he’s there with a girl and he was definitely not going to take the time to figure it out at that moment.  Chris Friesen don’t pay…was a favourite expression of his!!  In fact we learned that he usually ‘borrowed’ a sandwich at School ‘er day’ (that means ‘every day’) from his pal Cooper.  Sorry Cooper… if you’d ever like us to make you a sandwich, just come on over!!  In any event, the parking ticket was simply another one of those funny teenage moments that you learn from.  Not a big deal.  The next day, Ingrid wrote a note to the City of White Rock asking for reconsideration of this young driver’s folly…along with the payment in case they didn’t buy the argument!  We’re still waiting for a reply White Rock…

So you see where I’m going?  I’d love to see a parking ticket today, but only if I’m not the driver.  Have a safe week!

Be The Best.

Surfing the sunset.

The blog earlier this week about silver linings on the clouds made me take a closer look at other cloud pictures I had.  You’ll see a bunch of pics from the intense sky this week as well as a bunch of sunset pics from one of our favourite places…Hawaii.  In one or two of the images you’ll see a very small lone figure surfing at sunset.  I was thinking about surfers riding the edge of the wave and then Chris riding the edge of the clouds along that silver lining.  Hey, they say you are allowed to stare at the clouds and see things, right?  Hope you enjoy.  (you can watch in HD)

Be The Best.

Facebook saved our lives?

This was a quick update note that we sent earlier today to everyone who had joined Chris’ memorial page on Facebook.  I wanted to share it with you here as well.

Ingrid, Max and I wanted to thank you all so much for the support over the past 2 months.  It has been incredible.

If you want to continue to be with us as we journey forward towards the ‘new normal’, you can follow the blog link at: (I’ve added an email subscription thing at the bottom right of the page to make it easier for you to know when the new posts go up)

The other HUGE news is that through the generosity of Harrow Sports and the Burnaby Mountain Selects program, a Chris Friesen memorial lacrosse shaft will be produced and orders are going to be received through next Sunday, May 30.  When I first saw the artwork, and even now, I get goose bumps as this is very cool!

Here’s the great part.  All net proceeds (beyond the manufacturing cost) are going to the Christian Friesen Memorial Award at SFU!  We’ve had people ask if you have to play lacrosse to own one.  Answer? Nope!  They are real pieces of art complete with Chris’ signature, ‘Be The Best’ and the lacrosse ‘silhouette’ on the end cap of the stick. To see the sticks and for order info check out: and click on the ‘stick order’ tab at the top of page.

We can’t believe it is almost 2 months since Chris’ passing.  Month two in many ways has been harder than month one as the continued reality of Chris not being with us physically sets in.  That being said, the spirit of Chris is here in a growingly significant way.  I see it through people’s (young and older) desire to Be The Best and through people working together on positive change…including push-ups!

We will continue to keep the Facebook group open for the months ahead and want it to be a place you are free to drop a note to us or to Chris as well…and yes, that’s a completely ‘legit’ thing to do.  One of my first blog posts was about how ‘Facebook saved our lives’.  Those notes of support meant more than you can ever imagine.  We sincerely thank you all for your support during these weeks, not only of us, but your support of each other.


(for Randy, Ingrid and Max)