Tag: Chris Friesen

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Be The Best.

Chris Friesen Inspirational Award

Chaz Williams is a student from Brookswood Secondary.

He was the very first recipient of the Chris Friesen Inspirational Award given out by the School last week.

With permission, this is from a message that Chaz sent me.

Chaz…this is awesome.  This is Be The Best!  This is inspirational.  Great work.  We are all proud of you!!

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Chaz – I was the first recipient of this award given out from Brookswood. This was the speech. He says many great things about Chris so I thought you would like to hear it. It was written by our weight training teacher.

Teacher – I feel privileged to be able to give out the Chris Friesen Inspirational Award because we get to remember a student who was an inspiration to students, teachers and his community. As well, we get to recognize the recipient who demonstrates many of the same qualities that Chris showed. As a PE student Chris was one of the best. He arrived to class with a smile on his face, and he had a laugh that was contagious.

When it came time to get down to business, his commitment to fitness was second to none. Chris always worked to achieve excellence in athletics and academics. If he missed a class due to his Lacrosse schedule he would take the initiative to find out what he had missed so he could get it done and keep his “A” average. What I most admired about Chris was how he carried himself amongst his peers often joking but also knowing when the joke was over. He was very outgoing in the hallways and was well respected by the entire school.
Much like Chris, the recipient of this award has demonstrated the following characterisitcs:

-a dedication to fitness

-a drive for high academics

-kindness and compassion

-a sense of social responsibility

– accepting others as equals

The recipient of this award was not a hard person to find. He is the guy walking down the hallway with a smile on his face stopping to talk to someone before making his way on to another friend. His commitment to fitness has allowed him to be one of the most well conditioned students in the school.

This year he made up his own workout program which included 20 mins of continuous skipping and 40 mins of core strengthening. I asked him what his goals were in fitness and he said that it just makes him feel good. This past Friday at 4:00, I saw him as he was doing extra credit work to try and get an “A” in his English class. This student is truly a great inspiration to all of us.

Please join me in congratulating the winner of the Chris Friesen Inspirational Award, Chaz Williams!

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Be The Best.

Be The Best. Next Generation.

Ethanator’s Mom (Selena, Frank’s wife, Frank is Ingrid’s brother, Selena is my sister-in-law…got it?) sent me this pic a few days back.

Now that is what I’m talking about!!  Great job Ethan….doing the victory pose.

My father was a speed reader.  I remember him trying to teach us the techniques he had learned at the speed reading course.  One of the first exercises was to turn pages quickly…without even reading them.  Why?  It was part of training your brain to take in info quicker than you thought possible.  In essence you were training your brain to behave in a position of success as it pertains to speed reading.  (btw, my Dad at 79 can still outread anyone in my opinion.  Call him up in Vernon if you want a race…my money will be on him!)

Remember playing road hockey as kids?  What did you always do?  Lift your hockey stick in victory for scoring the big goal…even if you hadn’t scored yet.

It’s all part of practicing to be successful.

That’s why I love this picture so much.  Sure, Ethan is imitating the lacrosse silhouette Be The Best pose from his big cousin Chris, but he is also (whether he consciously knows it or not) training his brain to be a champion.

Now that’s BE THE BEST!

Rock your week.

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Be The Best.

Invictus

We recently watched the movie Invictus.

Morgan Freeman stars as Nelson Mandela and team captain François Pienaar, is played by Matt Damon.

What an stunning movie about change and choice in South Africa.  Mandela’s ability to forgive after 27 years in prison was amazing.  And not just forgive, but move to unite a country.  Quite an incredible story with the game of rugby serving as the stage.  The poem Invictus was used as inspiration several times…especially the last few lines:

I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

If that is not about the ability to choose…the ability we all have to decide how we will determine the future, I don’t know what is.

We can’t change the past, but we can change the future; one decision at a time.

Here’s the poem in it’s entirety.  For more info on the author, Henley, click this link. He knew a few things about adversity.

Invictus
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud,
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find me, unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

— William Ernest Henley

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Be The Best.

U is for underwear

I knew a month ago I would be writing this post.

I knew what I was going to write about.

I knew what I was going to show you.

I love being a father.  I was 25 when Max came along, perhaps young by today’s averages but I was ready.  Chris joined the family 19 months later.  It was Ingrid, Randy, Max and Chris for 17 glorious  years.  I loved every Father’s Day, but especially loved the handmade cards, breakfasts and little gifts.  Of course that changes as your kids grow, but there is one gift that has stayed in my bedside table drawer all these years.  An alphabet book from Chris (age 6ish), called Dad’s Alphabet Book.  Each letter included a priceless connection between father and son and we shared many laughs over the years at the pictures and the captions.  (You see a few of the pages below)  We would always come back to the letter ‘u’.

U – underwear is what you sleep in.

I don’t know why that was so funny…but it was and it is still is.

Chris knew how much this little book had meant and he had actually began a draft of a new alphabet book at my urging.  Yah, I know, with him being 17, I could only guess the ‘Family Guy’ type humour that would be utilized, but I guess I’m going to have to wait to see that finished product.

Now I must say that Max was exceptionally thoughtful and surprised me earlier this week with tickets for the 2 of us to see the BC Lions play on Sunday at the old Empire Stadium site which will be great.  Thanks MAX!! I’m looking forward to it!

Tonight though, on the eve of  Father’s Day, I wanted to share with you this alphabet book to help us all to remember that it is the smallest of things that can mean the most.  This gift did not cost any money, but it was and is PRICELESS.

Chris, I LOVE YOU.

Your Dad forever.

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Be The Best.

Is it ok?

Is it ok to still be sad?

Yes.

Is it ok to still ask why?

Yes.

Is it ok to still not understand?

Yes.

It’s ok to be where you’re at.  I’m there too.  As I’ve written a number of times, the main focus is on the future, but there will continue to be times where we wonder why.  Why Chris? Why us? Why now? Why?

I do know this however, the ‘why’ and ‘what if’ games are not great to be played for any long periods.

You know ‘why’?  Some questions don’t have answers.

I am writing this as much for myself as anyone else…and that is this.  The only thing I can control is my next decision.  The only thing we all have any control over is our next decision.

So if the ‘whys’ and ‘what ifs’ come to visit…you can say hello, but don’t invite them in for dinner…! 😉

See…I got through a post this week without mentioning a sunset…D’oh!!

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Be The Best.

I vow this is the last sunset blog….this week.

7:55pm June 16, 2010

Not sure what the complete fascination is, but I can’t stop taking pictures of sunsets this week.  The curiosity with sunsets doesn’t end at home.   Whenever we’ve been fortunate enough to get to Hawaii, watching the sun set was high on my priority list.

This week, it really has been incredible how you have that contrast of the dark clouds and the brilliant sun on a daily basis.  Maybe one of these weeks we’ll actually have a little sustained summer weather…but I digress..

Last night after writing the blog, I spent a little time catching up on some Facebook messages.  I am truly inspired and strengthened with all of the support.

This is a journey and journeys rarely track in a straight line.  I guess that is some of the comfort in the sunset.  There is a predictability with it.  There are websites that track the exact time each day the sun will do it’s thing.

You know the sun will rise and set…what you don’t know are the colours, cloud formations and the overall picture that will form each night.  Predictability and the unknown.  Maybe that’s the draw.  It’s the predictability and the unknown that are creating the most amazing pictures.  Interesting.

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Be The Best.

What is this…sunset week?

Langley sunset. June 15, 2010.

Really…I wasn’t looking for a sunset theme this week, but that is how it’s working out.

The colours here remind me of the colours of the rainbows we saw at some amazing times just after Chris’ passing.

Rainbows are mentioned as far back as the story of Noah and his ark and the promise of hope after the biblical account of a great flood.

Those rainbows in the days following Chris’ passing helped remind us that we were not being forgotten.  There was one very difficult day that the lacrosse team was doing a tribute for Chris.  It was amazingly wonderful and difficult at the same time.  It was stormy and raining heavily, but the hint of sun was on the horizon.  I thought we might see a rainbow, but didn’t.  We got to the arena parking lot and as I backed into the parking spot we saw a huge bright rainbow that must have been behind us.  I called my nephew Steve and told him as we had shared some of these stories and in the couple of moments we were on the phone the rainbow faded and was gone.

Like many other things I’ve written about, I realize that it rains a lot in Vancouver and a mix of sun and rain leads to rainbows!  That is a scientific fact.  It was just incredibly cool to see this ancient symbol of hope showing up at unexplained times and places in those first few weeks.

If you think this is interesting, wait for the eagle story in the next few days…!

This new normal thing ain’t easy or all that fun.  That being said, we know the sun will set each night which means just one thing.  The sun will rise again!  (ok, if I get too much more philosophical I think I may go see Dr. Phil…)

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Be The Best.

Gov’t workers and grief.

First a quick follow up to last night.  A couple hours after taking the sun setting shots, I looked out the window and saw this sliver of a moon with it’s lit edge.  This pic doesn’t do justice, but wanted to show you.  I looked again 15 minutes later and it was gone behind the clouds.  Tonight’s late evening sunset was equally spectacular again reminding me of the fact that the sun does exist behind the dark clouds.

Late this afternoon we had a rare hour to run errands during office hours in our town…(we’re usually still at BCIT or commuting during that time).  Things like passports, id, licenses all have to be returned or accounted for.  It’s not that fun.

We hear a lot about government workers, line-ups and grumpy people.  I have to say the people I dealt with today were wonderful.  Empowered front line workers who were empathetic, caring and efficient.  Yes, there were the forms, signatures and questions.  But they were handled in a very professional but caring manner.  I don’t know their names, but I’ll throw out a blanket THANK YOU to every front line employee from any government, school, or agency that goes the quick extra mile to connect with the people they’re dealing with as people and not just a number.

This process is difficult of course because it speaks so deeply to the truth of what is happening.  Chris is gone and won’t be back on this earth.  Of course we know that, but when you are surrendering documents there is a yet another piece placed in the finality puzzle.

Tonight we again tell ourselves that we know the sun is behind the clouds and the sun is certainly shining through.  Just look at the picture. (photo taken approx 6:30pm tonight)

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Be The Best.

Taking it to the Max.

Max, our oldest son, turned 19 today.  What?  How could that happen?  Already?

Yup.

Ethanator looks on as Max gets ready for 19 candles.

We had brunch with great friends, afternoon coffee with family and a ‘new normal’ dinner at the Keg tonight with the three of us.  Max and his gang are now ‘chillin’.

Max has been an unbelievable part of our family team during the past 2.5 months.  He helped me incredibly when we decided to build the official Facebook page for Chris.  He offered wonderful support to people at the funeral and in those intense weeks.  Max…you rock Dude.

As a Lifeguard and Swim Instructor he is helping change lives already.  He’s learning how to empower youngsters to believe in themselves, have confidence and do things they didn’t think they could do.

Max, as you head into your next years of long-term career exploration and studying, know that your Mom and I couldn’t be prouder of you.  Happy Birthday Dude.

And the sunset pic?  Well that was just a little silver lining hello from your Brother.

Sunset, June 13, 2010.

Work hard, be safe, have fun.

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Be The Best.

Golf and Being The Best.

I retired from golf this year and got a bike.

Problem: good friends (Ark, Gourd, and Bwaad – names changed to protect their livelihoods) insisted that a little weekend away to Osoyoos would be a good thing.

That was last weekend…and it was a good thing, except for the golf.

I thought of Be The Best many times as I lined up a triple bogey chip to get on the green.

Take a look at this picture.  This is me on the golf course.  One problem.  Do you see a fairway?  Do you see the green?  Do you even see the golf course?  No.  You see a huge bunch of grapes growing with my ball somewhere embedded in them.  I pity the fool who buys a nice bottle of wine only to pour a golf ball into their glass.

Sometimes Be The Best, may indeed be the understanding that a change of direction is a good decision!

That being said, I wouldn’t have changed the weekend at all.  It was a great one and another way of slowly building to the new normal.  These guys have stood with us throughout our journey and along with all of you form our army of support as we march forward.

Here’s a hint about tomorrow:  A certain kid named Max is turning 19…I was never much of a subtle foreshadower….