Author: Randy Friesen

Randy Friesen is a business strategist, manager and educator based in Vancouver, BC. He is also a husband and father. He loves the creative process and is active in creating art and music.

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Be The Best.

101 inspirations

Do you know what the total number of ‘Be The Best’ lacrosse sticks were ordered?

101.  Do you know how huge that is?  I thought if we would get 50 orders that would be amazing.

This was an incredible response and I’ll report back as we get the final figures on what that means to the Chris Friesen Memorial Award.  All I’m going to say at this stage, is that I think that Award is going to be the most sought after prize an SFU lacrosse athlete will be aiming for each year…and each winner will be challenged to change the world.

I spoke to someone this past weekend who had done some humanitarian work in an AIDS ravaged center in Africa.  The feeling of despair and hopelessness can seem overwhelming, until the realization of how helping ONE person will help ONE family that can change the lives of many over time.  What is the alternative?

So, when I talk about changing the world, I’m not talking about being the next Prime Minister or world icon.  I’m talking about changing one or two lives around you and then multiplying that affect over time.  We’ve already seen how Chris accomplished this in his short time on this earth.

101 stick orders?  Yes, but also 101 inspirations to Be The Best.

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Be The Best.

Roy’s in San Diego – the full story!

If you ever get a chance to go to Roy’s (Hawaiian Fusion Restaurant)….go! It is awesome.  We went for the first time in Hawaii several years ago and go back whenever we have a chance.  With the closest location in Hawaii or California, that’s not too often so when we were in San Diego a few weeks back with Steve and Meggan we jumped at the chance.

Because it was the Saturday night before Mother’s Day and they were doing a big Mother’s Day promo, I called the manager that afternoon and explained our situation to him.  I said that Ingrid was a very proud Mom, but too much emphasis on that point would be hard for us to deal with at this time.

The manager said no problem, he’d handle things….and he did.

The server was amazing.  Kind, attentive, outgoing and he didn’t say one thing at any point in the evening that remotely made us uneasy or uncomfortable.  As our dinner progressed the restaurant began to slow down and our server spent a little more time with us and we got to chatting about his pursuits (he’s studying architecture), his background (he’s from Miami and recently moved to San Diego to study) and his plans for the future.  You know who this young man reminded us of that evening in a very indirect way.  Yup.  And guess what was the topper?  At the end of the evening as we were paying the bill we asked what his name was.

“My name is Chris”, he said.

Of course it was.

Now, this was simply a chance encounter and we realize there are thousands of young men named Chris throughout North America.  That being said, it was a pretty special moment on the eve of a very different Mother’s Day.

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Be The Best.

Playground Follies and too big Max

This movie is dedicated to the Ethanator (my nephew Ethan) and his little sister Emily who both star in this epic film.  We took them to the playground a few weeks back before enjoying some soup in Fort Langley.

Young kids are unbelievably ‘in the moment’ but have an amazing sense of the beyond.  It’s hard to describe, but I love every second.  Ethan was an amazing cousin for Chris and honoured Chris through many hand drawn pictures and cards.  Emily is a little young to remember these events, but you can see in her a determination that has Be The Best written all over it!

Frank (Ingrid’s brother) and his wife Selena (our sister-in-law) were simply amazing support in the past few months and it’s awesome to see their little family come alive with such joy and passion for living.  I know that Chris loved you all so very very much.

The kind of fun we had in the park was simply an example of age having very little to do with the bond that forms between cousins and family.  Too big Max is a pretty cool dude for being willing to chase around a kid’s play park, but I think he might have actually been having a lot of fun himself!!

Enjoy the show.

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Be The Best.

That plant is dead.

If you would have seen this plant a few months ago you would have thought the same thing.  The winter had not been kind to this California Lilac bush and we were not sure it was going to survive.  Look at it today…like this evening..(yah I got distracted while mowing the lawn).  This plant not only has survived, but it is thriving.  Seeing the bees going crazy with the pollen on this plant is an excellent sign.  In some sort of way this is like the sun behind the clouds producing the silver lining.  We believe that we too will continue to renew and aim to bring hope and passion to those we meet along the way while we honour our son Chris.  That plant is dead…NOT.

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Be The Best.

D-fence.

I’ll try to bring some pics forward that you probably haven’t seen before.  Chris had played a December tournie in Seattle for a number of years including a few months back in 2009.

You see Chris here (grey helmet) in pursuit and ready to aid his fellow defender and ward off an enemy attack!  He loved playing defense.  Where other players lived to score goals, he got that same satisfaction stripping a ball from a goal scorer, breaking up an offensive play and then moving the ball quickly up the field to push his team forward.  Throw in some good physical contact and it was a great day at the office!

I love the second picture…taken on the next day.  He’s wearing his Team BC helmet (you can see the 41 on it) and he’s just provided the other team’s offensive player a reminder of what’s going to happen if he wants to get close to the goal.  One of his lacrosse teammates told me he hated going up against Chris in practice because he knew he was going to feel it, but he loved going against Chris in practice because he knew he was going to get better.

Getting better usually requires getting out of the comfort zone.

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Be The Best.

Room for a view (part 2)

If you haven’t read ‘Room for a view’ part one, have a quick start there and then this will make more sense…maybe!

Ok, so the results are in.  As of this morning, 44% of voters said painted lines on the freeway are 5ft long, 24% said 2ft, 18% said 8ft and only 15% said 10ft.  Answer?  It depends…but it is never under 10 ft. according to my definitive research team.  An American study indicates US lines are 10 ft, but I had a chance to talk to my Dad yesterday and he personally measured 16-18 foot lines in 3 different spots in BC a few decades ago (really!).  I had 10 feet in my mind, so upon further intensive research, where did I find my confirmed Canadian answer?  If you can believe it, right on the BCIT website for our Civil Engineering program.  The length of the lines “depends on the speed limit – sometimes the paint segments are actually five meters long (about 16 feet).”  Dad, you were right on!!  The point of the US study was that most people thought lines were 2 feet long.  In our poll, 85% of us believed the lines to be 8ft or under….which is too short.

The point? Both speed and angle of how you view the lines changes your perspective and therefore your understanding of how long those lines are.

I was in a video game store with Chris many years ago when he was about 7 or 8 and a lot shorter!  You know those video game display demo things they have at the front of the store?  He could easily reach the controls and he was trying out a game.  I was looking at the screen as he played.  ‘Look out’, I said, ‘you’re going to get hit’….and sure enough his player bit it.  This happened 3 times.  I asked Chris why he didn’t move his man…he said he couldn’t see.  I asked him what he was talking about, it was so obvious…just move your player to the right.

I can’t see Dad.  What?  Then it dawned on me.  I knelt down so my head level was at the same level as Chris.  Because of the angle of the screen and my ‘NEW PERSPECTIVE’, it was obvious.  The screen was angled and you could only see a shimmer of action at that level, not the full game.  What was ‘obvious’ to me, was not obvious to him, largely because of our angle of approach.

I’ve never forgotten that video game story and it’s helped me many times to remember to check my perspective.  The dashed lines on the freeway exercise is an interesting one as it challenges our understanding of what we think we see.  These blog posts are called ‘Room for a view’ because it’s a reminder to me to always be aware of seeing situations (work, family, life, business) from multiple perspectives.  Your speed and approach may lead you to greater understanding, room for another viewpoint…Chris taught me that on a video game system when he was 7 or 8.

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Be The Best.

Room for a view…

Perspective is an interesting thing.

You know those dashed lines on the freeway?  How long do you think they are?

I know we have a lot of young drivers following along on the blog, so let’s test our knowledge.

My Dad used to love to ask this question…and I got it wrong until I went out and measured one of those lines…except I didn’t measure it on the freeway.

Plus, this was a great excuse to use the Blog Poll feature.  Yes, I am fascinated by technology.  You can feel sorry for Ingrid at any time.  😉

Tomorrow’s blog will build on today’s poll, so vote away…and yes, there is a point to be made here..I’ll aim to make it…right after you vote.



		


	


	

		
	


	






	



	


		
			

				
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Ping Pong and $20,000.

		


			

		


		
	





	


		


			
It was quite a day.  Firstly, Ingrid played ping pong tonight after some pizza and watching a little NBA action.  That doesn’t usually happen, but Beau and Cooper (more of Chris’ gang from Brookswood) were over and she was right in there.  Max captured the action on camera.  Good games by all.


Earlier this afternoon we got some amazing news from Simon Fraser University.  The CHRIS FRIESEN MEMORIAL AWARD FUND has reached and surpassed the $20,000 goal!!!  This is amazing news as it means Chris’ fund is now set for life and will continue to provide opportunity for lacrosse playing SFU students for decades to come.  THANK YOU ALL!  What an amazing accomplishment.  This is WITHOUT, the dollars raised from the lacrosse sticks and AC’s incredible donation of proceeds from Love Shines which are still to be added and will continue to help the fund grow.  Wow.  We are humbled, excited and are looking forward to making the first presentation of the Chris Friesen Memorial Award in January 2011. From wristbands to cheques to thoughts and prayers you have all contributed to making this award a legacy fund.  We are incredibly amazed at the support and generosity.  THANK YOU!!!


Now, let’s get back to some ping pong!


Beau powers a serve while Randy does something...


Cooper pounds a return while Max thinks about how Lost ended.


Look at that concentration.




		


	


	

		
		


			

		


		
	


	






	



	


		
			

				
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I’ve got nothing…

		


			

		


		
	





	


		


			
‘I’ve got nothing.  I can’t think of anything to say.’


I’ve heard that a lot in the past few weeks and again today.  Guess what?  I totally get it…and I totally respect it.  Guess what else?  We deeply respect and appreciate any thought or action including many who don’t know what to say.


What is there to say?  Ingrid asked me how I was doing today.  Good and sad was my answer.  It was a good day…but losing Chris has left a hole that is so large it will simply be impossible to fill in this lifetime.  That being said, so many awesome things are happening.  I’m hearing stories (facebook, email, phone calls, in person) about people Being The Best.  It is awesome.  The Chris Friesen-Be The Best lacrosse sticks are amazing! (reminder: orders close this Sunday). I got a call this week from Team BC, the Provincial lacrosse team.  The U16 and U19 teams will be wearing a CF on their jerseys at the Canadian Nationals this Labour Day in Saskatoon!  How cool is that?


Chris (41) handles ball at Field Nationals 2009 in Winnipeg


These are the things that keep us moving forward.  Not just the remembrance stuff, but the knowledge that Chris touched so many lives and has inspired so many.  And don’t forget, Be The Best doesn’t mean winning all the time.  Max and I were watching Steve Nash and the Suns lose to the Lakers in a heartbreaker tonight.  Yah, they lost, but Steve Nash was the best.  He was incredible.  That’s what it is all about.  Breaking your own records, setting the bar higher and HELPING PEOPLE along the way.  Life is a team game!


Go rock your Friday.


		


	


	

		
		


			

		


		
	


	






	



	


		
			

				
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2 months plus a day…

		


			

		


		
	





	


		


			
Tonight I take you back to night one.   At some point we tried to sleep but sleep was not on our side that evening so I sat in my chair in the livingroom and looked out the window.  We live on a little rise and framed in our window was the lit cross at the Christian Life Assembly shimmering in the distance and one light on a hill above the church.


That lone glowing light from a far away home nestled above the glow of the far away cross provided some comfort on that first night.


With so many sympathy cards coming our way in the weeks that followed, I was surprised at how many were different.  There was one card however that came at least four or five times.  It’s a simple blue band on a white background with a rhinestone star.  There is just one simple statement, “one star in the night sky”.  After two months plus a day, that one star is shining ever brighter.  The glow is being duplicated in hearts and minds from young to old as we all strive to Be The Best.