Tag: Christian Friesen

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Be The Best.

Happy Thanksgiving?

Just a quick note to wish each of you a very Happy Thanksgiving.

People have asked me what we’re doing, how we are ‘celebrating’ etc.

It would be easy to think that there is not much to be thankful for this year, but strangely enough I feel mostly the opposite.

Please don’t misunderstand.  If we could, we would have Chris back in a millisecond.  That is a given.  That will not change.  Our love for Chris only grows day by day and we miss him so terribly much.

That being said, we know he physically can no longer be with us so we must choose to continue our journey on earth with Chris with us in spirit…and that’s what we’re doing.

So with that as the consistent backdrop, do we have things to be thankful for?

Yes.  Here’s 5 of them.

  1. Family – My wife and son Max are amazing to me.  I couldn’t be more proud. (extended family too!!)
  2. Friends – Continue to be friends in the deepest sense of the word.
  3. Work Colleagues – Quietly supportive by allowing work to be a place of alternate focus.
  4. Sports – Love watching competition. Love competing.
  5. Coffee – It’s those small things in life that can be so great…especially when you’re sharing.

 

Thankful?

Yes.

And although not on an official list, I am so incredibly thankful for every event, photo, moment, laugh, discussion, drive, walk, ping-pong game or meal we had with Chris.  So incredibly thankful.

Chris…know that we love you so very much and we LOVED every moment we had with you.

For that we are thankful, not just this weekend, but forever.

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Be The Best.

Dinner for 3?

I found this picture on my Blackberry this weekend.

It was taken from the stage at CLA, the church where Chris’ funeral was held.

I took the picture the day before the funeral as we were setting some things up and doing some logistical planning.

I wanted to show Ingrid and Max where I thought we could sit and how things might work for the service.

Looking at the picture now just over 6 months later, it really symbolizes the new normal in a significant way.

We sat in a row of 3…not 4.

That was my initial thought.

But take a another look.  Yes, there are only 3 chairs in our row,but look at all the other chairs behind us…and that was only one section.

That church was packed with 1500 people supporting our family.  That’s a HUGE part of the new normal.

As for Chris, he doesn’t need a physical seat anymore.  He’s with us in spirit…every step we take and every move we make.

Love ya kid.

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Be The Best.

The best time to plant a tree is…

You may have heard the proverb/truism, ‘the best time to plant a tree was yesterday, the second best time to plant a tree is today’.  Probably the best time would have been 20 years ago, but the point remains.

I like this saying.

Why?

One of the things that I’ve done since Chris passed away was get more serious on a consistent level  about doing push-ups every day.  (I know there are a number of people that have taken up this same challenge.  Fantastic!)

Slowly, I’ve worked up to 50 per day still way off Chris’ 200, but that’s ok…I’m the ‘old man’!  There’s been a few days where because of schedule or whatever, I haven’t got those push-ups done.  You know what’s easy?  Making that first ‘miss day’ a second and the second a third.

That’s when the tree quote thing becomes very important.

The best time to do push-ups was yesterday.

The second best time is today…like right now.

Be The Best.

I love this business quote by the owners of Kin’s Farm Market, one of my business clients.  They said, ‘our business is simple, but not easy’.  Love it.  Many things are relatively simple.  Do some push-ups every day…relatively simple.  But not so easy in practice.

Change itself isn’t that easy, but the small steps along the way are relatively simple.

Interesting.  I continue to learn along this journey and Chris himself was an amazing example of a kid who heard from coaches and college players that a good diet was key to success and so he made small, simple decisions to eliminate fast foods, pop and junk food from his diet, one day, two days, three weeks, four months and then years.

He told me that his ‘trick’ was asking himself every time he looked at a food that was tempting and asking himself if it would be worth the work to burn that off or would it be easier just to avoid it in the first place.  Pretty amazing will power for a young man.

Simple…not easy.

Better to plant yesterday, but yesterday is gone so let’s deal with today.

These simple thoughts have put me down on the ground many times in the past 6 months, pounding out a few more push-ups when I didn’t really ‘have the time’ or some other excuse.

Chris…I will continue to use your passion to inspire me…and I know you continue to inspire many.

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Be The Best.

Brothers

I remember when we had both Max and Chris as young dudes in piano lessons.

One night, they had a piano recital.  They were both scared.  It was sort of comical.  Here’s why.

Brothers are brothers.  That means always a punch or comment or wedgie or attempted wedgie or something.

That’s what brothers do.

Here’s what else brothers do.  They have each others’ backs.

During this piano recital, the fooling around was over for the night..or at least until the ‘stupid’ recital was over.  It was simply, I’m gonna support you and you’re gonna support me and we’ll get through this horrific event of playing this instrument in front of people we don’t know.

Love it.

Brothers.

Forever.

Chris goes for 'atomic wedgie'...yah, that's Max's head in there somewhere.

Chris and Max ham it up at Disneyland.

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Be The Best.

It’s dark, but love shines.

The days of Spring and Summer are now behind us.

For those of us who live in the Vancouver area of the Great White North, we experience those breathtaking summer nights with sunlight reaching to 9:45pm and beyond.

As the days grow shorter and wetter, many of those sunsets that were so powerful to me are now packaged up and waiting to surprise again next Spring.  It had been over a month since I last listened to Love Shines, that powerful and moving song that AC (Auntie Cathy) sang at Chris’ service.

I just listened now and as I did I looked out the window at the total pitch blackness.  The words are Love Shines and Darkness Flees.  Only thing was, it’s still dark outside.  The meaning of the song became even more powerful to me tonight.

Of course.  We can’t escape the physical darkness.  So too in our journey, there will continue to be dark times.  We cannot escape those.  BUT love is shining through that darkness and allowing our lives to continue to be pulsated with light through the love of family, friends, colleagues, lacrosse connections etc etc.  I think our own actions and choices to be involved in changing lives through Chris’ fund and other opportunities (giving is in grieving), also helps to chase the virtual darkness.

This weekend, AC gave me an update on her upcoming album.  She’s going out on a limb.  As an artist, I think it’s the most difficult thing to do to put yourself out there not only as an artist, but also as a business person.  She is self funding her new album driven by the passion of Love Shines and other songs that will help bring hope to many.

You can get involved all the way from pre-ordering the CD to a larger investment that includes a House Concert at your place for friends and family!!  Cool.

What I love about this is the passion, goal setting and desire for change to help propel a dream.

If you haven’t listened in a while, have a listen now online (yes, that’s free!).

If you get excited about the project, check out AC’s website with all the details.

Love Shines and Darkness Flees.

Love it.

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Be The Best.

Grandma’s Quilt

You may remember those blogs about quilts.  You can connect here if you haven’t read them already.

Some amazing work by Kim, a part of my incredible marketing team at BCIT.  Amazing work on many levels and we love it.  Anyone who comes over wants to see the quilt.  I love seeing the lacrosse players pick out their numbers or friends and family recognize the jerseys and clothes that were Chris’ favourites.

I want to show you another quilt tonight.  (who knew this was going to become a quilting blog..!)

The Friesen side of the family had a few days together in the summer of ’09 and my Mom (Leona, Grandma) had an idea of making a quilt at that time.  The goal was for each family member to design a square.  It could be stitched or simply designed with coloured pens.  Each square was to represent something about that person.  Most family members completed their squares over the few days with the last few squares added in the weeks following.

What a cool idea.

What do you think Chris drew?  Yah, not that hard to guess…a couple of lacrosse sticks and a beautiful message to Grandma.  “I love you” in his own handwriting.

He loved his Grandma so much.

Each year he looked forward to her canned peaches and would eat a jar at a sitting if we didn’t catch him first!

What a testament to a Grandma’s love.  What a testament to Chris who wasn’t afraid to tell people he loved his Grandma and Grandpa…even as a 16 year old kid at the time.

What an idea to make this quilt.

I saw it completed just a few weeks ago and this video gives you a close up look at this priceless piece of art.

“I love you”.  Powerful.  We love you too Chris.  Always.

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Be The Best.

Terry Fox – Into the Wind

Last night, Steve Nash, an NBA MVP and proud British Columbian, brought the story of Terry Fox to an American TV audience in a show called, Into the Wind.

I missed the show, but will definitely be watching for another viewing.

It was all the talk on the sports talk-show on the radio as I battled traffic out of Burnaby today.

He ran a marathon every day.

Are you kidding me?

He ran a marathon every day…with one leg.

For 143 days, he ran that distance as an amputee.

Terry Fox was the epitome of determination.

Terry Fox was the epitome of passion.

Terry Fox epitomized Be The Best.

Jay Triano, the Toronto Raptors head coach and another proud BC boy, knew Terry Fox from Simon Fraser University.  He was quoted in Saturday’s Toronto Star.

“He talked about chasing his dream, a big, big dream,” said Triano. “He showed that you have to set your goals high and even if you don’t achieve them, you can still win.

“That’s with me every day.”

Don’t you love that?

He showed that you have to set your goals high and even if you don’t achieve them, you can still win.

Love it.

I spoke with a good friend who had just finished an Ironman race a few weeks back (3.8k swim, 180km bike, 42.2km run).  He completed in 17 hours.  Wow.  That’s a story by itself.  Absolutely amazing.

He told me how mental the process was.  It was sheer will and determination to put one foot in front of the other and keep going in the marathon after a grueling swim and an intense bike ride.

Incredible.

I can’t imagine how Terry Fox did it for 143 days.

Some people ask us how we do it.

One foot in front of the other one, one step at a time.

Terry showed us the way.

He showed us how to win.

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Be The Best.

I met a kid.

My work at the BC Institute of Technology is fun in that I have the opportunity to connect with the next generation of world changers.

Our students tend to be focused on where they want to go and what they want to do.

I met a student yesterday by complete happenchance and just loved his story.

He was a first year student in the Marketing Pro Sales option and had worked for Future Shop for a few years post High School.

His sister had come to BCIT and she told him it was a lot of hard work but worth it in the end.  A very good explanation.

So what did this kid do?  Get scared about the impending work load?  Party hard cause there was going to be a lot of work in the future?  Run away?

I loved his response.  He told me that last January he purposely took a second job to crank his working hours to over 60 per week.  Not really for the money.  It was to PREPARE himself mentally and physically for the workload he knew was coming.

Why?  He knew the payoff would be worth it in the end.  From my years of experience, I’ll tell him one thing. Yup, it will.  It will be well worth it in the end.

I loved that interaction and that story.  It was a Be The Best moment from out of the blue.

I met another kid once who set goals and then worked hard to achieve them.  You’ve met him too, even though for some of you it may have only been through this blog.

Chris knew that goals in your brain or even written down were useless if they weren’t brought to life with hard work and then more hard work.

Be The Best.

Rock your Saturday.

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Be The Best.

Hair Bald Steve

My nephew Steve and his wonderful wife Meggan are up in the Vancouver area and it’s great to see them.

As you might remember, they stayed with us during the time around the funeral and Steve did an amazing job on working with me to get that eulogy video complete for Chris’ funeral.

When they left for home it was a hard good-bye.

We saw them down in San Diego and it’s been too long since then, but it’s great to connect.

Chris loved Steve as did/does Max.

When the boys were younger, Steve was the cool 20 something Dude who could do no wrong.

When he had a shaved head for a while (yah, and not the kind that I have where I make mine ‘fashionable’ because of being follicly challenged…), the boys called him Hair Bald Steve.

It was a great name and it stuck.

It was great to see Hair Bald Steve in action and it just continues to prove the strength and bond of family regardless of the usual miles in between.

We have some physical separation with Chris these days too, but we know he’s with us always, in our thoughts, in his spirit and sometimes in our trucker hats and running shoes.

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Be The Best.

This is my family.

My two sons.

My wife.

Me.

This is our family.

The pictures from this family photo shoot two years ago have become more precious than gold.

They captured the essence of who our family was.

As Chris was still in a major growth period he was mad that he was so small (his opinion!) in these pictures.

We all had a laugh and talked about the next round of family photos a few years in the future.

Ingrid and I just loved these pictures.

It was money well spent.

In fact it was money well invested.

Have you taken your family’s picture lately?

For us, the pictures (both professional and personal) have been a priceless connection to our son and will continue to provide connections forever.