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Be The Best.

Go to bed…it’s a school day tomorrow!

Ok, you can stay up to read just ONE blog post.

Well, here we are.  The start of a new school year is just around the corner, or just one sleep away.

This Labour Day weekend was so very different from the last one.

I missed being in Saskatoon for the Field Nationals (lacrosse).  Instead we had an impromptu semi family reunion at my Dad’s hospital bedside as he went in for colon cancer surgery that had not even been on the radar 2 weeks earlier.

He’s doing very well by the way, and hopefully heading home Tues or Wed.  Our family appreciates your continued thoughts and prayers.  I’ll have more on that situation and some things I learned there later in the week, but now back to lacrosse.

Both the BC U16 and U19 teams played for in the gold/silver game against Ontario on Sunday afternoon.

Imagine an Ontario team that has thousands of kids try out and picks one team of the best.  BC does the same with a fraction of the numbers.  It’s hard to measure heart size however.  These young men on Team BC wore the mighty CF on their jerseys and I know Chris was yelling like crazy during both games.

If you can believe it, Ontario won both games, but only by ONE GOAL.

To give some perspective, the U16 BC team lost to Ontario by over 10 goals in the round robin.

This result is nothing less than amazing to me.

Remember the ’94 Canucks and their Stanley Cup run?

Remember Trevor Linden hugging Kirk Mclean in that epic photo after game 6 of the Finals?

Yah, those New York Rangers and their big money (pre-salary cap!) won the cup.  Sure.

But the Canucks won our hearts.

Our BC boys just did the same.  Although for us, our hearts were already printed on each jersey in each CF.

That’s Be The Best and a win in my books anytime.

Thanks for doing us so proud.

Tomorrow:  Chris Friesen’s lacrosse stick scores multiple goals in Saskatoon!

Rhys, Blaine and Mitch with their silver medals and the Chris Friesen lacrosse stick. (the black paint is to help with glare) Photo courtesty of Burnells. Thanks!
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Be The Best.

Ontario, BC and the run for gold.

In just a few hours from the time of writing this post, The U16 Team BC Field Lacrosse Team will be fighting for the Gold medal against Team Ontario.

From what I can see from the web stats, the U19 BC Team will also be playing for Gold against Ontario this afternoon.

Ontario is always dominant…but they can be beat!

Team BC proved that a few weeks ago at the National Box tournie in Coquitlam, beating Team Ontario in the round robin portion of the tournie.

For many of these boys, as it was for Chris, these games and this experience this weekend, will be a life long lacrosse highlight and another stepping stone towards playing at the collegiate level and beyond.

The hope of course is for all these experiences to help these young men develop not only as sportsmen, but as people.  One day soon, some of them will battle together as Team Canada taking on other nations.

For our family of course, today is significant as the entire BC squad (both U16 and U19 teams) are wearing a CF remembrance on their jerseys.

I KNOW Chris will be watching very closely today.

Good luck to all!!

BONUS:

I took some video at the BOX nationals a few weeks back.  This is the most intense bodycheck I have ever filmed.  You can do your own analysis, but from my perspective the Team BC player was very smart to not turn into the boards, but instead turn his shoulder and absorb the hit.  His helmet and pads protected him as the hit took him hard into the boards.  I would like to think that the Ontario player wouldn’t have had to make that hit in the first place, but it is the intensity of the game that gets in players (and fans) blood and that is what keeps them playing!  btw, the referee as you will see does not call a penalty and was clearly in a very good position.  Anyhoo…a little lacrosse talk for your Labour Day weekend.

GO TEAM BC GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Be The Best.

Trucker hats, running shoes and walking the new normal.

First, a thank-you to all of you for the thoughts and prayers and support for my Dad going into surgery today.

The Docs were pleased with how things went and Dad (Jake) will be spending the next 5 days or so in the hospital getting stronger.

He was already joking with the nurses with some bad puns tonight…hmmm…wonder where I get that from…

So what do you do before surgery?  Go for a walk of course and get some exercise even if you haven’t eaten in 2 days.  Of course you do….if your name is Jake Friesen.

We had a great walk today and I realized that Dad was wearing the trucker hat Ingrid and I had given him from Chris.  This was Chris’ favourite hat at the time of his passing and his Grandpa was the logical person to wear it.  If you haven’t yet, you can see Chris trying it on Grandpa last New Years and the related blog post.

I also was wearing my hand-me-up sneakers from Chris that I wrote about the other week.

So here we were having a little stroll and Chris was with us as Dad prepared for his fight with cancer and surgery later that day.

Couldn’t imagine a better Be The Best moment.

And as I put at the end of the little video, anytime is a good time.

In other words, anytime is a GOOD time…ie, even though our family is together here to support Dad through his battle (and Mom with hers), we can still have fun, laugh and get a little exercise.

The other meaning of course is that ANYTIME is a good time to go for a walk, have a chat, build a relationship, play tennis, go skiing, go hiking, play scrabble, have dinner with family, play ping-pong or anything else you can think of.

I loved that Chris joined us today too.  Love ya kid.

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Be The Best.

Be The Best rolls into Saskatoon

Chris, 41 (middle), gets ready for action in Winnipeg 2009

One year ago this weekend, Ingrid and I along with other parents and families followed our sons to the National Field Lacrosse tournie held in Winnipeg.

That tournie rolls into Saskatoon this Labour Day weekend.

Chris LOVED this tournament.

When he won a place on the national all-star team, announced at the tournament banquet, it was a moment of achievement that was the culmination of goal setting, hard work, practice, and more hard work.  It meant the world to him…although he would not say that publicly.

When I got a call a couple of months back that both the U16 and U19 teams from British Columbia would be wearing a CF on their jerseys, our family was both humbled and proud.

Boys, when you put on those jerseys, know that Chris will be there with you in spirit.  It was the shoulder to shoulder combat that he loved.  He wanted to win badly and he knew that winning came from hard work on the defensive end of the field and taking care of each other.

He knew that winning was much more than adding up the collective skill level of each player.  It was about working together as a team.

He knew that leadership is something you didn’t talk about, you DID.  If you wanted your team to play hard, you played hard.  If you wanted your team to be physically fit, you were physically fit.

We wish Team BC all the very best of luck (remembering you make your own luck!) this weekend.

One of my favourite pics of Chris in action. (Winnipeg 2009)

To all the other teams, Chris would love to strip the ball from you, race down the field and pass to an Attack for the winning goal.  He’d then be the first one to take off his helmet at the end of the game, flash you that million dollar smile, tell you that you played a good game (and mean it) and talk about staying connected.

All the very best to each Provincial team represented this weekend.  That’s Be The Best.

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Be The Best.

I know a Noah.

Noah rocks out Be The Best poster in his room. Great look!

I met a young man earlier this summer named Noah.

He came over with his Dad, Mike, and his friend Tyson.

I had never met Mike before or Noah or Tyson, but it was like we already knew each other.

You see, Noah and Tyson play lacrosse for Langley.

They hadn’t met Chris but they knew him.  They knew Be The Best.

Noah’s got a Be The Best poster in his room.

Mike has been doing push-ups in Chris’ honour for months.

LOVE IT.  LOVE IT ALL.

What’s amazing to me is the inspiration I feel from hearing these stories.
It helps to drive me forward.

Noah and gang represented Langley at the Provincials and although they didn’t win a medal, they played hard and learned a lot.  As we’ve said many times here, Be The Best is not always about winning.  It’s about learning how to win.  Learning how to get better at whatever…lacrosse, school, work, life.

Mike, Noah and Tyson…thanks for being part of the Be The Best family!

Noah's jersey with the Be The Best patch. COOL!

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Be The Best.

Grief Philosophy meets Greek Philosophy

I came across a few quotations of a Greek philosopher named Epictetus.  He lived from Ad 55-135.

How do I know this?  Cause Wikipedia says so and it never lies…

In any event, Epictetus was an interesting fellow.

Try these quotes on for size.

No great thing is created suddenly.

Or this:

It is your own convictions which compels you; that is, choice compels choice.

Or finally:

God hath entrusted me with myself.

All interesting on their own.

When you take them together, I think even more interesting.

Remember way back a blog post about my thoughts of humans being different from the animal kingdom on the basis of the opportunity to choose?

Epictetus seemed to have that figured out a few thousand years back.

God has entrusted us with choice.

We make choices.

No great thing is created suddenly.  It’s really a series of small choices.

What I really like about this thinking is that when I make a bad choice it’s the body of work that is really what will be looked at, not one decision.

I think that is what makes Chris’ life so powerful.

When you look at the body of work, it’s a few poorer choices (that so many of us have made during our teenage years and beyond) but many more amazingly powerful positive choices.

That’s the Be The Best philosophy at work!

It’s not about winning or losing.  It’s about Being The Best.  That means, learning from mistakes and making more choices.  Simple philosophy…a little harder in action, but that’s the goal!

Making choices and decisions with our God-given human ability and working towards that ‘great thing’ that is never created suddenly.

Have a great week.

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Be The Best.

Fight Night

Beau Brooks, on left, prepares for debut match against Mat Andreatta.

Two teens from Brookswood Secondary are getting into a fight tonight.  This is the school both Max and Chris attended.

No, not behind the school.  No, not in the hallway.

This is an amateur boxing match where Beau Brooks is making his debut against Mat Andreatta.

Beau was a very close friend of Chris.

Beau joined our family this past New Years at Silver Star for a few days of skiing and snowboarding.

Beau, I know someone who is going to have a virtual ring side seat for this match and going to be going crazy for you!!

Having a dream of being in the ring, going after it, training hard and then getting your first fight along with the front page of the sports section in the paper…that’s Be The Best!

You’ll have a little something special in your corner tonight Beau.

For the full story in the Langley Advance article.

Where: Coast Hotel and Convention Centre – 20393 Fraser Hwy

When: Fri, Aug 27 starting at 7:30pm

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Be The Best.

Boys and their toys.

I had a phone call today with Tom Golden from Maryland, USA.

You may remember that name from a blog post a week or so back titled, ‘For men only…yah right’.

It was a very interesting conversation as we explored topics about men and the grieving process and how men react differently to loss and honouring a loved one.

We are looking at doing an interview via Skype in the future so stay tuned!

There was one very interesting thing though that I couldn’t wait until that interview to share.

Tom again had some great insights into the male perspective on communication and how that relates to the grieving process.

He told me some amazing stories about sports stars and musicians…but I’ll keep you waiting for those and let him tell you.

I had told him about an example of ‘man communication’ that I relayed on this blog a few months back.  Going on a golf weekend with ‘the guys’ is usually about 90% having fun, letting your hair down (ok, you know that hurts seeing as my hairstyle is a Number 1 with a razor…) and DOING STUFF.  There is usually some (maybe 10%) sincere and deeper conversation, but not predetermined or predictable.

This was not news to Tom.  He stated that it is the ACTIVITY itself, the ‘shoulder to shoulder battle’, that bonds men.  That ties into everything from war to sports.  It was the next comment Tom made that really hit home.  He said that it is the joined activity (fighting an enemy, conquering a mountain, driving an ATV around) that combines some danger and challenge that provides a SAFE ZONE for men to talk to each other.  ie, if this guy has my back, I may be able to have a deeper conversation.

I found that very interesting.

You see in the vid attached a little fun with ATV’s courtesy of Drake with Wayne and Brad driving and yours truly filming while trying to hold on.

Thinking about this another way…four hours of golf to have a 2 minute serious conversation.

It’s all making much more sense now.  Maybe I will unretire from golf after all.

btw…I know it’s 5 months today that Chris passed away and we continue to thank you for remembering us in your thoughts and prayers.

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Be The Best.

Those sunsets.

Those sunsets still get me.

I can’t see one without thinking about Chris.

Whether it’s the sun streaming through the clouds or punching out that silver lining or just glowing as it nears the mountains or horizon, I love it.

These pics were taken during an evening of friends and fun (thanks Melody and Drake!).

The sun will set.

The sun will rise.

And more decisions will be made.

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Be The Best.

Team BC and Be The Best.

Team BC played Ontario on Thursday evening at the Midget Box Lacrosse Nationals.

Just another lacrosse game? Nope.

Firstly, Ontario is always favoured.  Consider this.  Based on population alone, Ontario (at 13 million+) could have three lacrosse teams for every one from BC (population 4.5 million).

Do I want some cheese with this ‘whine’?

The point is Ontario is always big, strong, tough, confident and ready to win.

The Iroquois had just beaten Alberta in the late afternoon game setting the stage for BC to get into serious medal contention and relegating Ontario to a bronze finish at best.  That alone provided a huge motivation factor for the Ontario team, but it was BC who seemed inspired.

BC hit hard, but weren’t stupid.

BC played strong defence which leads to goals.

BC scored when they had chances to score.

BC played like a team!

In the end, BC won the game 7-4, pulling away in the 3rd period.

FANTASTIC.  That’s Be The Best!

I think of Chris often when I watch.  He LOVED this game.  He loved the passion that it evoked.  He loved playing for his local team and club teams, but there was always something special about representing your Province.

As the boys get ready for a showdown at 11:30 this morning (Aug 20), I will be thinking of them.

Depending on the outcome of the late morning game against Alberta, BC will go for gold or bronze later tonight.

The bronze and gold medal games are at 6pm and 8pm.

Have a great day.

—–

2pm update! Team BC lost a close one with Alberta so they play Ontario for Bronze at 6pm.

Team BC player (Chris Nasato) in blue BC jersey with gold trim breaks away from the Red and Black Ontario squad.