Tag: Sports

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Be The Best.

Steaming to Be The Best.

The Canucks honoured Stan Syml the other night at Roger’s Arena.

For those ‘well aged’ enough to remember, Stan ‘Steamer’ Syml epitomized the lunch bucket, hard working, never quit attitude of the Canucks in the early 80’s and led the Canucks on their improbable run to the Stanley Cup Finals in 1982.

I talked to Max and Chris about Stan Syml and my new favourite over the more recent years Trevor Linden.

I have the most priceless pictures of each of those players drawn by Max and Chris (Max drew Linden, Chris drew Syml) with their hockey cards inserted in the frame.  They gave them to me as Christmas or Birthday presents about 10 years ago and they are still proudly displayed in my office at BCIT.

The thing I loved about Smyl was that he just never quit.  It wasn’t about talent.  It wasn’t about speed.  It wasn’t about size.  It was about heart.

Love it.

As we enter another hockey season, I will never forget the conversations about hockey and sports and how we weaved that into conversations about life and working hard to achieve goals etc.

That’s Be The Best!

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Be The Best.

Happy Thanksgiving?

Just a quick note to wish each of you a very Happy Thanksgiving.

People have asked me what we’re doing, how we are ‘celebrating’ etc.

It would be easy to think that there is not much to be thankful for this year, but strangely enough I feel mostly the opposite.

Please don’t misunderstand.  If we could, we would have Chris back in a millisecond.  That is a given.  That will not change.  Our love for Chris only grows day by day and we miss him so terribly much.

That being said, we know he physically can no longer be with us so we must choose to continue our journey on earth with Chris with us in spirit…and that’s what we’re doing.

So with that as the consistent backdrop, do we have things to be thankful for?

Yes.  Here’s 5 of them.

  1. Family – My wife and son Max are amazing to me.  I couldn’t be more proud. (extended family too!!)
  2. Friends – Continue to be friends in the deepest sense of the word.
  3. Work Colleagues – Quietly supportive by allowing work to be a place of alternate focus.
  4. Sports – Love watching competition. Love competing.
  5. Coffee – It’s those small things in life that can be so great…especially when you’re sharing.

 

Thankful?

Yes.

And although not on an official list, I am so incredibly thankful for every event, photo, moment, laugh, discussion, drive, walk, ping-pong game or meal we had with Chris.  So incredibly thankful.

Chris…know that we love you so very much and we LOVED every moment we had with you.

For that we are thankful, not just this weekend, but forever.

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Be The Best.

Terry Fox – Into the Wind

Last night, Steve Nash, an NBA MVP and proud British Columbian, brought the story of Terry Fox to an American TV audience in a show called, Into the Wind.

I missed the show, but will definitely be watching for another viewing.

It was all the talk on the sports talk-show on the radio as I battled traffic out of Burnaby today.

He ran a marathon every day.

Are you kidding me?

He ran a marathon every day…with one leg.

For 143 days, he ran that distance as an amputee.

Terry Fox was the epitome of determination.

Terry Fox was the epitome of passion.

Terry Fox epitomized Be The Best.

Jay Triano, the Toronto Raptors head coach and another proud BC boy, knew Terry Fox from Simon Fraser University.  He was quoted in Saturday’s Toronto Star.

“He talked about chasing his dream, a big, big dream,” said Triano. “He showed that you have to set your goals high and even if you don’t achieve them, you can still win.

“That’s with me every day.”

Don’t you love that?

He showed that you have to set your goals high and even if you don’t achieve them, you can still win.

Love it.

I spoke with a good friend who had just finished an Ironman race a few weeks back (3.8k swim, 180km bike, 42.2km run).  He completed in 17 hours.  Wow.  That’s a story by itself.  Absolutely amazing.

He told me how mental the process was.  It was sheer will and determination to put one foot in front of the other and keep going in the marathon after a grueling swim and an intense bike ride.

Incredible.

I can’t imagine how Terry Fox did it for 143 days.

Some people ask us how we do it.

One foot in front of the other one, one step at a time.

Terry showed us the way.

He showed us how to win.

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Be The Best.

Chris scores a goal!

During last week’s Midget Lacrosse Nationals it reminded me of Chris at the 2007 Bantam Box Lacrosse Nationals in Ontario.

btw, Team BC lost in their bronze medal bid this past Friday night.  A tough way to end after that epic battle with Ontario to beat them in the tournament round.  From Ontario’s perspective, I’m betting they had a little payback on their minds and with BC having to play an extra game Friday morning, they took advantage.  All that being said, some great lacrosse by all and some great development as players and young men going through all of those emotions and experiences.

Back to 2007.

In order to help with the trip expenses to Ontario, the players were allowed to raise private funds to help make the trip a reality.  I recently uncovered the one-pager that described the program and gave potential donors an idea of who Chris was.

Here is how it opened:

Know many teenagers who write down their goals?

Know many teenagers who then break down their goals into actionable work plans and don’t quit until they’ve made it?

Meet Chris Friesen.

Along with excellent grades, this 14-year-old wrote down a goal of making the top-tier lacrosse team (A1) in Langley.

He served as team captain and the team completed an amazing season in first place heading into the Provincial championships in mid July.

In addition to league play, he was selected to Team Fraser Vally and then to Team BC.   He will be representing our province in Ontario this August.

Chris and buddy Brett celebrate BC’s bronze medal at Nationals in August 2007.
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Specifically, I will always be thankful to my Wardell clients and friends at Mainland Machinery and Sitelines Architecture respectfully, for their major support of Chris during that program.

I’ll never forget Chris writing down that goal (a practice we’ve done as a family at New Years each year).

It was achievable, but a stretch goal for sure.

  1. Goal.
  2. Action plan.
  3. Don’t quit.

I got it son.

I’m listening.

BONUS:

There are over 300 photos on-line of that 2007 trip.  Click here to view.

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Be The Best.

Team BC and Be The Best.

Team BC played Ontario on Thursday evening at the Midget Box Lacrosse Nationals.

Just another lacrosse game? Nope.

Firstly, Ontario is always favoured.  Consider this.  Based on population alone, Ontario (at 13 million+) could have three lacrosse teams for every one from BC (population 4.5 million).

Do I want some cheese with this ‘whine’?

The point is Ontario is always big, strong, tough, confident and ready to win.

The Iroquois had just beaten Alberta in the late afternoon game setting the stage for BC to get into serious medal contention and relegating Ontario to a bronze finish at best.  That alone provided a huge motivation factor for the Ontario team, but it was BC who seemed inspired.

BC hit hard, but weren’t stupid.

BC played strong defence which leads to goals.

BC scored when they had chances to score.

BC played like a team!

In the end, BC won the game 7-4, pulling away in the 3rd period.

FANTASTIC.  That’s Be The Best!

I think of Chris often when I watch.  He LOVED this game.  He loved the passion that it evoked.  He loved playing for his local team and club teams, but there was always something special about representing your Province.

As the boys get ready for a showdown at 11:30 this morning (Aug 20), I will be thinking of them.

Depending on the outcome of the late morning game against Alberta, BC will go for gold or bronze later tonight.

The bronze and gold medal games are at 6pm and 8pm.

Have a great day.

—–

2pm update! Team BC lost a close one with Alberta so they play Ontario for Bronze at 6pm.

Team BC player (Chris Nasato) in blue BC jersey with gold trim breaks away from the Red and Black Ontario squad.
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Be The Best.

For men only…(yah right)

I know the methodology of many guys who ‘read’ this blog.

Their Significant Other reads it and passes the information on to them.

Many guys don’t read much.  I get that.

Guys do stuff. I get that.

Guys grieve differently. The ‘professional grieving industry’ (sarcasm) doesn’t really get that.

I found a very interesting author/speaker on-line talking about the differences between men and women and how that relates to grieving.   I haven’t read his book (case in point from above…I like to own books and read parts of them…), but I watched his 20 minute mini presentation on men and grief and was very impressed.

With my management instructor hat on, I’ve spoken many times to my students about the differences between cultures  and communication AND the differences between men and women and communication.

One excellent point that Tom Golden makes is that women tend to communicate face to face…ie they literally like to look at each other when talking.  If you hadn’t noticed, when a man talks to another man, they don’t tend to do this.  Face to face for a man is all about confrontation and challenge.  What men like to do is go shoulder to shoulder and fight something together.  Think sports (lacrosse (of course), hockey, football, soccer, whatever) which replicates ancient traditions of battle.

Anyhooo, when it comes to grieving men still want to DO stuff.  I’ve mentioned this to many people but not here in this blog.  If Chris and I used to work on cars together, I would probably be finishing a car right now.  If we hunted together I’d probably arrange a hunting trip with ‘da boys’.  For me to honour Chris, the SFU Chris Friesen Memorial Fund was a huge goal and it was as much a part of the male grieving process as going to lacrosse games and writing blog posts.

Shoulder to shoulder combat.

For the men reading, take a look at this video on the attached link.

For the women reading for their men, take a look at this video on the attached link…and then drag your husbands/boyfriends/friends/sons over to take a look…or just watch it for them and let them what it was about.  🙂

It’s some interesting food for thought.

Guys:  Sorry this blog post was so long.  367 words is way too much.  Go do something.

Link to Tom Golden video (vid at bottom of page):

NOTE:  I’m not endorsing etc. Just another viewpoint along our journey!

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Be The Best.

But back to the quilt…

Ok, more stories from the quilt.

After the funeral, we had friends and family pack up all the display tables of Chris’ lacrosse stuff, pictures etc.

It was days later when we realized that many people had brought items with them and left them on the tables in memory and honour of Chris.

It was amazing.  Necklaces, pendants, quilting squares!, lacrosse balls, jerseys and more.

The Burnaby Mountain Selects program meant so much to Chris and many of the guys brought their jerseys to the funeral and left them there.  When we found jersey after jersey at first we were confused.  Then we realized what happened and were simply overwhelmed with the thought behind that action.

One entire side of the quilt is dedicated to the the BMS family which really symbolizes the entire lacrosse family as these players came from different towns and different teams.  Some of them had been big opponents, but were now brothers-in-arms.

This quilt and that gesture of support and recognition will never be forgotten.  Thanks to everyone who brought something with them, wrote a note for Chris or to Chris or said a prayer or had a thought of support for us that day and for all the days since.

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Be The Best.

Vuvuzela withdrawl…really?

Ok, it’s the first Sunday in about a month without a soccer match.  That hurts.

I LOVE the World Cup along with a few billion people around the globe.  I think that is one of the big reasons I like it so much.  With American (Happy 4th of July) opinion aside, soccer IS the world’s sport and it’s fantastic to watch.  With a little Dutch and German heritage in our family, we are hoping for a Netherlands/Germany final next Sunday.

I know Ingrid’s Uncle Don is a BIG Dutch supporter and lives in Holland so we may be leaning to the Netherlands and perhaps wearing a little orange if we can get through to the finals this week.

As you’ve seen documented in this blog many times, I love sports.  Sports has also been an amazing help in getting through these first three months without Chris.  Obviously lacrosse was a MAJOR part of our lives in the past 8 years. Being able to go on the emotional ride with the Canucks this Spring and then following the Flyers (Hawks officially omitted from this blog until Canucks beat them in playoffs)  through to the Cup Final, watching Tiger implode on the golf course and off, or following the World Cup of Soccer, it is the ‘guy drama’ that keeps many of us captivated and inspired.  If I was writing a grief book for guys, there would be a chapter in there called, ‘watch sports on TV…it’s good for you’, or something like that!

Anyhoo…back to today…I am missing those vuvuzelas strangely enough.  Hold it.  There’s a BC Lions game on at 4?  Great.  Those CFL horns are a close 2nd.

Have a great week.

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Be The Best.

Invictus

We recently watched the movie Invictus.

Morgan Freeman stars as Nelson Mandela and team captain François Pienaar, is played by Matt Damon.

What an stunning movie about change and choice in South Africa.  Mandela’s ability to forgive after 27 years in prison was amazing.  And not just forgive, but move to unite a country.  Quite an incredible story with the game of rugby serving as the stage.  The poem Invictus was used as inspiration several times…especially the last few lines:

I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

If that is not about the ability to choose…the ability we all have to decide how we will determine the future, I don’t know what is.

We can’t change the past, but we can change the future; one decision at a time.

Here’s the poem in it’s entirety.  For more info on the author, Henley, click this link. He knew a few things about adversity.

Invictus
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud,
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find me, unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

— William Ernest Henley